BROCKTON ROX OFFER THEO A JOB

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It is probably a mere joke and publicity stunt from the ever original PR department of the Can-Am League team that plays down in Brockton, Mass. but here are a few reasons I think Theo should consider a job with the Rox.

1. He could watch his replacement fail from only a few miles down the road.

2. Bill Murray and the other owners and executives of the Rox probably wouldn't go behind Theo's back like the Red Sox did.

3. He could stay in baseball doing what he does best/loves while simultaneously having more free time to do whatever it is he wants to do outside of baseball. I think Dan Duquett'es become a better, more well-rounded person since he left the Red Sox and opened up His Sports Academy in the Berkshires.

4. He could definately activate himself a la Michael Dorn in Major League II. Maybe then could he attain the baseball knowledge of former college baseball hero Larry Luchino. (There's no HTML code for sarcasm but there should be) As a matter of fact, playing for the Rox would be a step up over Luchino because the Rox are a pro team.

5. Bill Murray seems like a much more fun and entertaining guy than John Henry.

6. Housing in Brockton is much cheaper than housing in Boston

7. Campanelli Stadium is much nicer than Fenway Park.

8. Dan Shaugnessey could be banned from Rox games, as well as the city of Brockton itself. In fact, an effigy of the Shank could be hung from one of the foul poles.

9. I'm sure the Rox don't have monumental problems like getting an entirely new pitching staff or dealing with overpaid players that beg to be traded than beg to stay.

10. Did I mention Bill Murray?