I Want the Maple Leafs to Get Luongo, So All My Least Favorite Players Are on One Team

It's Deadline Day in the NHL. And I want the Canucks to trade Roberto Luongo to the Toronto Maple Leafs. I hate Luongo. He's an overrated, whiny, douche. He's perfect for the Maple Leafs, who already have two of my least favorite players in the game.

Toronto already has Phil Kessel, who is more popular in Boston as a Maple Leaf than he ever was as a Bruin for three reasons: 1. He's the reason we have Tyler Seguin here, 2. ditto Dougie Hamilton, and 3. he's the reason HE is no longer here. He played his own way, wasn't tough, was an incomplete player, and he was greedy.

And playing for the Leafs' AHL affiliate is Mike Komisarek, former nemesis of Milan Lucic. This guy, when playing in Montreal, epitomized all that is wrong with Canadiens hockey. He would typically only get tough when guys like Lucic were safely restrained on the bench. And when Komisarek did actually grow a pair and throwdown, he'd get thrown down.

So if the Leafs acquire Luongo, it will make it easy and convenient for Bruins fans to find their most hated players all in one place. Then the Leafs can sign Matt Cooke and PK Subban to make the team's douchebaggery complete.

Bruins Acquire Jagr-Meister

It's official. The Bruins have acquired Jaromir Jagr. He has not decided to go to Pittsburgh instead.

Two illuminating facts about Jagr:

1. He was an All-Star in 1992. He's old.

2. He has 14 goals. Nathan Horton and Milan Lucic have combined for 17 goals this season.

He is not a typical Claude Julien guy. He isn't a good defensive forward. He's an offense-first player. And maybe that's a good thing. The Bruins must emerge from their comfort zone and get a little aggressive on offense. Especially on the Power Play.

Speaking of which, Jagr has scored 6 PP goals. That's as much as Brad Marchand and Tyler Seguin combined (each have 3). I'm salivating as I think about a Power Play line of Seguin-Krejci-Jagr or Marchand-Seguin-Jagr.

We have yet to see with which line Jagr will play. You don't want to mess with the Bergeron line, although if he Bergeron is out do you slide Seguin to center and have Jagr play the wing?

I can't imagine the Bruins would waste Jagr's offensive skill on the 3rd line. I think his best fit would be to play with Krejci and Horton, and move Lucic down to the 3rd line. There Lucic can focus on playing physical, Jagr can play with some talented forwards that will set him up, and who he can set-up.

They still need help on the blue-line. And certain players like Lucic need to step up their game. Jagr helps, and can solve some of the Bruins problems. Not all of them. And some problems need to be solved by players currently on the roster.

Bruins Show Energy in Victory Over Ottawa

The Bruins played a lively game last night, edging Ottawa 3-2 in what has become one of the most exciting matchups within the division. Certain players, such as Nathan Horton and Milan Lucic, seemed to be playing with extra energy. Perhaps they don't want to be demoted when Jaromir Jagr arrives, perhaps they're eager to be the ones to play with him.

In any case, the Line Formerly Known as First showed up in a big way. Krejci and Horton scored. And Lucic had an assist on each one.

The Bruins got 50 shots on goal. Seguin fired 12 of them. The Senators launched 47 at Anton Khudobin. Those stats demonstrate how wide open and up-and-down this game was. And how close these two teams have played each other all season.

Speaking of Khudobin, has he earned a third-straight start? He's played excellent, especially at home. He's making big saves. And

The Bruins host the Devils Thursday night.

Photo Credit:
AP Photo/Elise Amendola