Showing posts with label Jack Edwards. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jack Edwards. Show all posts

Friday, April 18, 2014

Bruins Stanley Cup Drinking Game: Red Wings Series - Game 1

It's Friday night and the Boston Bruins are finally playing the Detroit Red Wings. It's been 57 years since these teams have met in the postseason and it feels like half that has been the time between the end of the regular season and tonight's game. I've developed a serious case of Bru balls waiting for this series to start and tonight's finally the night. Here's a drinking game to play while enjoying Game 1 of the series...

Anytime Jack Edwards says...
"Against the eddy of the flow" = take 1 drink of beer
"A-frames" = 1 drink
"Bee in his bonnet" = 1 drink
"Blows a tire" = 1 drink
"Loses an edge" = 1 drink
"Up ice" = 1 drink
"Wing to wing" = 1 drink
"D to D" = 1 drink
"Johnny rocket" = 1 drink
"Juicy rebound" = 1 drink
"Save by Rask" = 1 drink

Anytime this is on screen...
Someone holding a replica Stanley Cup
Dennis Seidenberg skating in practice = 1 drink
Dennis Seidenberg sitting on the 9th floor = 1 drink
Henrik Zetterberg = 1 drink
Jack Edwards jumping up and down = 1 drink
An octopus = drink for 8 seconds
Black and white photos of Bruins/Red Wings history = 1 drink per photo
Mike Babcock = 1 drink
Angry Claude Julien = 1 drink

Anytime this happens...
Brad Marchand pisses someone off = 1 drink
Patrice Bergeron wins a faceoff = 1 drink
The crowd goes "Tuuuuuuuk" or "Kruuuuuug" = 1 drink
Andrej Meszaros screws something up = 1 drink
Zdeno Chara's height/reach is mentioned = 1 drink
A Swedish player scores = 1 shot of Absolut
Jack Edwards praises Pavel Datsyuk = 1 drink
Edwards yells = 1 drink
Edwards cackles maniacally = 1 drink
Edwards alludes to something pre-1950 = 1 drink
Edwards complains about officiating = 1 drink
Edwards reminds you of Tommy Heinsohn = 1 drink + 1 Tommy Point
A fight (unlikely) = finish your beer and take a shot

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Tim Thomas Throws a Nutty

I'm a big Tim Thomas fan. What he did for the Bruins was amazing. I like him because his career path was so untraditional, and required hard work and determination. The guy played all over the US and Europe before getting a chance as an NHL goalie. And in his two Vezina winning seasons, he began each campaign as the backup then earned the #1 spot.

I don't like what he did Tuesday night, slashing Bruins forward Carl Soderberg on the neck. It was a dangerous play.

I did enjoy Jack Edwards' indignation. After years of orgasming every time Thomas aggressively "protected" himself in the crease, Edwards now wants Thomas suspended. I used to think Edwards was just another homer announcer, only more exuberant than most. Now I think he's more of a hypocrite with double standards for the B's and the 29 other teams.

And you Bruins fans should measure your anger at this play. Listen to the TD Garden crowd chant Thomas' name after this slashing incident in the 2011 Stanley Cup Finals...

You loved when Thomas did this stuff for you. You don't get to act like you have moral high ground when he does this wearing a different uniform.

After the game Thomas joked about the State of the Union being less painful for him to watch then allowing 6 goals, and claimed that his slash of Soderberg was a response to something Soderberg did to him on a previous play.

Thomas has always actively defended himself. A slash to the neck is significantly worse than a slash to the leg, and I think a suspension or hefty fine would be appropriate disciplinary action for the League to take.

But I still like Thomas. I like him because of that fire he brings to the game.

And unlike Wes Welker, Thomas didn't injure one of his former team's most important players.

Friday, June 28, 2013

NESN Is Foolish to Break Up the Naoko-Edwards-Brickley Line

NESN has decided not to renew the contract of Bruins "sideline" reporter Naoko Funayama, so as of this summer she will no longer be working for the regional sports network.

You fools!

She was great. She did her job well. Her reports were concise and to the point. She wasn't distracting. She didn't steer the broadcast away from the game. She played her part in the well-balanced line of Funayama-Edwards-Brickley. Edwards brought the colorful character, Brickley brought the expert analysis, and Funayama brought the ground-level reporting.

Funayama did what fewer and fewer sideline reporters do: REPORT. She had a good rapport with the players, and she was respected by everyone (as evidence by the stream of Tweets about her losing her job). Who else would inspire both media colleagues and Bruins players to mourn her departure?

The word "Naoko" is trending on my Twitter at the moment. For a sideline reporter. On this week of all weeks in Boston sports.

I don't know why NESN did this. It certainly can't be for failing to do her job. They must have a replacement in mind.

Maybe she'll be replaced by some bleached blonde bimbo with hair extensions who spends less time reporting in the dressing room than she does undressing players with her eyes.

Maybe she'll be replaced by some Bill Simmons type, who doesn't try to get a good answer, but rather tries to ask a question that becomes a story in and of itself.

Maybe NESN wants Bruins broadcasts to be like Red Sox broadcasts, and have a sideline reporter that moderates social media discussions, and relentlessly promotes the non-sports aspects of the on-air product.

Or maybe she'll be replaced by Leah Hextall, who is a fine reporter, and Ron Hextall's niece, but I just don't see the need to replace Naoko at all.

Unfortunately, working hard, being respected by peers and interviewees alike, and taking your job seriously are no longer the hallmarks of sports journalism. This is the era of the loud, bombastic, speculative sports journalist. This is the era when eye candy is more important than substance. This is the era when a TV channel would rather employ a reporter who asks questions that piss off the interviewee, as opposed to a reporter who gets their questions answered.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Kate Upton Should Do Play-by-Play for the Bruins (So We Can Watch Her Jump Up and Down)*

Bruins play-by-play announcer Jack Edwards has received some criticism for jumping up and down when the Bruins tied the Rangers Tuesday night. And I think that's a bit unfair. He was excited. And if I were at the game, I'd be jumping up and down too. What made Edwards look silly were the circumstances surrounding his jumping:

1. Men wearing suits look silly when they jump up and down.

2. Men wearing suits look extra silly jumping up and down when standing next to a man in a suit who isn't jumping.

3. Skinny old men with glasses look ridiculously uber-silly when jumping up and down standing next to a man in a suit who isn't jumping.

People like to criticize Jack Edwards, and use the word "caricature" to do it. And while Edwards's shtick goes well beyond normal broadcasting homerism, I think the people critiquing him should remember that he is an entertainer. He's not covering a Presidential Debate or doing play-by-play of a high speed chase. It's a hockey game. Edwards is the equivalent of a goofy weatherman. He tries to add a bit of fun. And if you're not entertained, that's your opinion. But don't get on a high horse about "broadcasting professionalism" or anything like that. He's not trying to be Dan Rather or Walter Cronkite. He's calling a hockey game.

And when you look back at the all-time most memorable sports broadcasters, who stands out? The subdued, dignified, by-the-book professionalists? Or the nutjobs? Who would you rather listen to, Joe Buck or Harry Carey? Do you want to go back in time and get Yogi Berra fired for being a caricature? Or go even further back and tell Red Barber to stop using southern catchphrases like "walking in the tall cotton" or "can of corn?"

Edwards gets carried away. Which is what being a fan is all about. His routine isn't for everyone, just like any entertainer's. But he does his research, he knows the game, knows the players, and to me seems just as professional as any other broadcaster I've heard.

I would still prefer Kate Upton bouncing up and down instead of him.