F-E-E-T FEET FEET FEET

In case you haven't heard, there's been some foot fetish videos unearthed, that star a woman who looks remarkably like Rex Ryan's wife. And they include the voice of a man, sounding similar to Ryan, remarking how beautiful the woman's feet are, even asking to smell them.

I haven't seen the video, and I don't really want to. To me, the most devastating proof that Rexy's involved is his response to questions over the videos:

"It's a personal matter."

Wow! Has Rex Ryan ever answered a questions as if he were an adult? This is Mr. Reality TV. He's not denying it. He's not saying "it's a prank." And we're still waiting to hear his special teams coach accuse Bill Belichick of having a foot fetish.

This is just a funny story to me. And it's kind of stupid. Why, while you're a coordinator for an NFL team, are you and your wife posting weird feet videos on the internet?

The opportunity for humor and bad puns is endless. They stretch for miles and miles (5,280 feet). Some examples:

Rex Ryan's favorite goddamned snack is fruit by the foot.



Some people ask Dr. Ruth for sex advice, Rex goes to Dr. Scholl's.

COLLEGE BOWL PICKS/PREVIEWS: PART 3*

It's almost Christmas. That means a nice mishmash between obscure bowls, and those middle class bowls that actually have history and meaning. Here are the previews for three of those upcoming Bowls.

Sunday - 8:00 PM - ESPN
Little Caesars Bowl - Detroit, MI
Florida Int'l Golden Panthers vs. Toledo Rockets
Toledo has a slightly more impressive record, and they're playing in the heart of MAC-country. I'm picking Toledo. I can't find a picture of a hot Toledo girl, so here's William Shatner singing "Rocketman."



Monday - 5:00 PM - ESPN2
AdvoCare V100 Independence Bowl - Shreveport, LA
Air Force Falcons vs. Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets
If you hate the forward pass, this game is for you. Air Force was 117th in passing this year, Tech was 119th. Conversely, Air Force was 2nd in rushing (317.9 yards per game), and Tech was 1st (327 per game). So this will be like watching football in 1890. I'm picking Air Force.



Tuesday - 6:30 PM - ESPN
Champs Sports Bowl
#22 West Virginia Mountaineers vs. NC State Wolfpack
The first bowl game between BCS conferences is a nice matchup. WVU nearly won the Big East, and NCSU vied for the ACC Atlantic title. Don't expect many points, and expect WVU and the #2 defense in the country to propel the Mountaineers to victory.



Tuesday - 10:00 PM - ESPN
Insight Bowl - Phoenix, AZ
#12 Missouri Tigers vs. Iowa Hawkeyes
Iowa stumbled down the stretch, and struggled mightily against good teams. Missouri, on the other hand, held their own. They even beat Oklahoma. I'll take Mizzou.



More picks after the Holiday and the weekend. Merry Christmas!

MY COLLEGE FOOTBALL PLAYOFF FORMAT

There needs to be a playoff. The BCS is a complete failure. It's led to multiple champions in one year, and frequently led to great teams being left out of the title game. TCU is only the latest victim in a long history of teams getting screwed. So here's my basic plan:

#1: The regular season ends on Thanksgiving weekend
Every team's schedule, including conference title games, should be completed by the Saturday after Thanksgiving. This will allow the playoff games to be played BEFORE the start of bowls games.

#2: Top 6 teams qualify
This keeps the playoffs exclusive, maintains the importance of each regular season game, and rewards the #1 and #2 teams with a bye. All 6 teams would be qualified for a BCS Bowl. But before that happens, the 6 and 4 seed would play at the 4 seed's stadium. And the 5 would play at the 3 seed's. The winners would advance and play the 1 and 2 seeds at their stadiums.

#3: Non-BCS bowls selected and played just as before
Playoff games would be held the first and second weekends of December. Regular bowl games start on the third weekend.

#4: Eliminated teams given BCS bowl berths
The two surviving teams would meet in the title game in January. The 4 teams knocked out would participate in BCS bowls, along with 4 teams that did not qualify for the playoffs.

So you still get all the good parts of the bowl system, and also get legitimate National Championships.

COLLEGE BOWL PICKS/PREVIEWS: PART 2*

It's a great time of year. Spend the day at work, do Christmas shopping in the evening, then come home to watch some college football. On a weeknight! We actually have some intriguing games to watch, including one that's a whopper. So here are our previews for all of the week's games:

Tuesday - 8:00 PM - ESPN
Beef 'O' Brady's Bowl St. Petersburg Bowl - St. Petersburg, FL
Southern Miss Golden Eagles vs. Louisville Cardinals
Louisville actually beat UConn, and Syracuse. But they lost most of their other games. They were 3-6 against BCS teams. I think Southern Miss will take this game seriously, and prevail.



Wednesday - 8:00 PM - ESPN
MAACO Bowl Las Vegas - Las Vegas, NV
#19 Utah Utes vs. #10 Boise State Broncos
Not a bad pre-Christmas matchup. The Broncos will find their way to the Mountain West, where Utah will be their biggest competition. I'm rooting for the Utes, because I'm tired of the hype surrounding Boise State. Unfortunately, I think they're slightly more talented, and will win in a close, high scoring, and entertaining game.



Thursday - 8:00 PM - ESPN
San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl - San Diego, CA
Navy Midshipmen vs. San Diego State Aztecs
Both teams will be well-supported. SDSU, obviously, is playing close to home. But there are around 20,000 sailors stationed in San Diego. I'm going to go with Navy in this one.



Friday - 8:00 PM - ESPN
Sheraton Hawaii Bowl - Honolulu, HA
#24 Hawaii Warriors vs. Tulsa Golden Hurricane
Hawaii won 10 games. Of course, they played 13. They only lost once at home, and have the #1 passing game in the country. They throw for 387.8 yards per game, and scored 9th most in the country at 39.9 points per game. They're also 109th in rushing. Tulsa has a solid offense, but was ranked 84th in scoring defense. So I'll take Hawaii, and the over.



More picks to come on Thursday.

WHAT THE DUCK?

This game literally put me to sleep. Give soome credit to Jonas Hiller, who stopped 45 shots. But how many of those shots were any good? How many were aimed well? Have the Bruins ever seen this picture:



And if so, are they capable of hitting those targets, and at least forcing a goalie to do work to stop the puck?

The Bruins like to play a cycling offense, passing the puck around in the offensive zone. Strangely, their plan is to get the puck to the defensemen on the blue-line (60 feet from the net), instead of trying to pass the puck to the high slot or the faceoff circles (12 to 20 feet from the net). Then the defensemen blast a shot, and the Bruins hope it gets deflected.

This kind of close your eyes and shoot offense might be the best the Bruins can do, I'm afraid. Because so many of the forwards lack the puck skills to do anything else. Is it me, or do the Bruins seem to have the most trouble passing the puck without bouncing it over their teammates sticks? Concurrently, they also seem to have the most trouble handling a bouncing puck.

The guys who do have puck skills, typically lack the strength and physical presence to win battles.

I'd like to see the Bruins try to move their bodies around in their offensive cycling. That confuses the opponents, leads to missed assignments, and gets the goalie moving.

In the off-season, the Bruins' offense needs to be completely restructured and retooled. There's too many "playmaking" centers, and not enough play finishing wingers. Instead of trying to build 4 solid lines, the B's should try to assemble 2 very good lines. And they need forwards who can do multiple things, not just good passers, or good battlers, or fast skaters.

Both Bergeron and Recchi play the game the right way. However, they're both branch players. They're missing pieces to teams with strong cores. The Bruins do not have a strong core.

The B's have a few days off to sit in the corner and think about what they've done (1-3-1 in their last 5) before hosting Atlanta on Thursday.

Photo Credit:
AP Photo

WAKE UP CALL

I'll be honest, I didn't see much of the game last night, so can't offer much opinion on it. It seems like the Pats went up against a solid defense, struggled at times, but in the end, they made the plays that won the game.

All of us were pretty confident about this game. After all, the Patriots were on a ridiculous tear of domination, and Green Bay would be without Aaron Rodgers. But the Packers really put up a scrap. The Pats couldn't convert on 3rd down, and if it wasn't for the turnovers they forced, and big plays on special teams, they would have lost.

The defense really has become more like the 03-04 glory years. They're opportunistic, and they're retrieving the ball.

It's kind of a cliche thing to say, but Dan Connelly is an ideal Patriot. A 71 yard kickoff return? For an offensive lineman? Who also plays fullback in goal-line situations.

Julian Edelman is starting to wear thin on me. We all assumed he'd be Welker Jr. last year, because he's a similar mold of player. That was probably an unfair level of expectation. Then again, he's been absent from the passing game. And I'd rather see Woodhead returning punts.

The Pats didn't clinch the division, or a bye, as the Jets beat the Steelers. However, they can clinch both with a win in Buffalo on Sunday. That would also clinch home-field throughout the playoffs.

Photo Credit:
AP Photo

COLLEGE BOWL PICKS/PREVIEWS: PART 1*

It's bowling season. Which means a few dozen games between teams none of us have even seen yet. It means unpredictability. It means surprises. It means tantalizing inter-regional matchups. All three of these bowl games are this Saturday.

2:00 PM - ESPN:
New Mexico Bowl - Albuquerque, NM
BYU Cougars vs. UTEP Miners
Bowl season begins with a pair of 6-6 teams, so you'll forgive me if I don't get too excited. BYU's had a down year, but did have a 5-3 conference record. UTEP lost 5 of 6 down the stretch. I'll go with BYU in this one, purely based on conference records.



5:30 PM - ESPN:
uDrove Humanitarian Bowl - Boise, ID
Northern Illinois Huskies vs. Fresno State Bulldogs
NIU won 10 games, and ran the table in the MAC until the conference title game. Fresno nearly beat Nevada, and none of their 4 losses came to embarassingly bad teams. I'll pick Fresno State simply due to reputation.



9:00 PM - ESPN:
R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl - New Orleans, LA
Ohio Bobcats vs. Troy Trojans
An 8-4 MAC team against a 7-5 Sun Belt team. And who says we have too many bowl games? I'll pick Troy out of proximity. They're in Alabama, I think. But I'll still use an Ohio girl.



More picks on Tuesday.

ANOTHER 1 GOAL LOSS

The Bruins are in the middle of what I called "Exam Week." It's an 8 day, 4 game stretch when the Bruins would be playing the Flyers, Sabres, Canadiens, and Capitals. They're 0-1-2 in that stretch, and are in danger of earning an F.

I know they've all been 1 goal games. But the manner by which this team has lost is what's pissing me off. The Philly game was an excellent effort and a fine performance. The Buffalo and Montreal games, were not.

Last night, the Bruins gave up a quick goal. Granted, it was the softest penalty shot call I've ever seen. However, Lucic gave the Canadiens the breakaway with a pass that wasn't worthy of a high school scrimmage.

Lucic had his worst game of the season. He scored a goal thanks to good positioning, and a clever tip-in, but he gave the puck away all night. I honestly felt like he should've been moved to another line. The B's wasted Horton and Krejci's shifts by having Lucic out there. Hopefully he's not hurt, and he remembers how to pass.

I don't expect this team to score many goals. In fact, I was stunned to look at the numbers and see that the B's are 12th in goals scored per game. Doesn't that surprise you? What irritates me is the lack of patience and discipline in the neutral zone, and on defense.

Montreal's 2nd goal was helped by Shawn Thornton failing to do his post-faceoff duty and collapse toward the net. That allowed 3 Canadiens to hover around Thomas, against just one Bruin defenseman. Easy goal. Thornton's not accustomed to playing center, but by this point in his NHL career, he should know the basic defensive duties after a faceoff.

I've praised the 4th line all season, but recently they've aggravated me. They bring energy, with no chance of scoring. Then Thornton has the above brain fart. Then Campbell goes after Subban after a big hit, gets 2 minutes, and Montreal takes advantage with a goal.

Julien gets touted as a great coach because of his disciplined positional style. But I just don't see it. Discipline isn't discipline unless it's consistent. And the Bruins haven't been consistent.

The B's host the Caps Saturday night.

Photo Credit:
AP Photo