MANNY BEING SUSPENDED

Manny Ramirez has tested positive for performance enhancing drugs, and received a 50 game suspension from Major League Baseball. In other news, Manny apologist Bill Simmons has been hospitalized for severe dehydration due to crying so much once he heard this news.

I couldn't be happier with this suspension. Not only does Jason Bay have more RBI and HR than Manny this year, he also has fewer 50 game suspensions.

And how will Manny spend his time off? Drinking with Enrique Wilson? Shoving elderly Dodger employees around? Slapping teammates? Nursing that problematic hamstring injury? Talking about rejoining the Cleveland Indians?

Wait, I've got it. He'll do what he did when he faced Mariano Riveira in Yankee Stadium... just stand there and do NOTHING!!!




Source:
LA Times

HOUSE OF PAIN

I'm writing this recap of the Celtics game a bit late, so I'm probably the 1,000,000th person to use a horrible pun with the word "House" in it, but I could care less.

Orlando continued their lackluster play, which began in Game 1 when they let a 28 point lead dwindle to 3. This time, the Celtics didn't have to dig themselves out of a hole, they got to put Orlando in one.

In the playoffs, you need to get gamebreaking performances from unlikely sources, at least once or twice per series. Last night, Eddie House provided. 31 points off the bench, 4 for 4 in 3 pointers, 11/14 from the field. A vital 28 minutes from Eddie.

Rajon Rondo had yet another triple doubles, 15 points, 18 assists, 11 rebounds. After a sleepy night in Game 1, Rajon woke the F up. His third triple-double in the postseason. National Basketball Association, I introduce you to someone you've been ignoring: Rajon Rondo.

Ray Allen found his legs again, he was 7 for 15 from the field, with 22 points.

Scalabrine continues to have a good series, 8 points, 3 rebounds, +11. Not bad at all.

Orlando just doesn't scare me, and they never have. Their coaching is questionable, Howard is containable, Redick is a college player lost in the NBA. They just aren't a frightening playoff team.

I think they'll put up a fight down in Disney, but the Celtics should come back to Boston with a 3-1 lead, and I think if this series lasts longer than 6 games, it will be a miracle for the Magic.

Source:
ESPN.com

Photo Credit:
AP Photo/Winslow Townson

WOW, THAT ONE HURT

The hockey gods are cruel, but fair. Do good things, they'll reward you. Do bad things, they'll destroy you. When the Bruins did good things like position bodies in the crease, they were rewarded with goals. When they committed sins, like turning the puck over deep in their own zone, they were punished with Carolina goals.

As good as Cam Ward, Eric Staal, Jussi Jokinen and the rest of the Hurricanes played, the Bruins lost this one. EVERY SINGLE CAROLINA GOAL CAME OFF TURNOVERS. And these were hardly forced turnovers. These were Brett Favre turnovers.

Carolina Goal #1:
This actually came off a turnover which came off a turnover. Bergeron made a silly pass at his own blue-line, Carolina had a lengthy possession in the Boston zone, getting 6 shots off (some were blocked, 4 weren't), and eventually Michael Ryder committed a penalty from all the pressure. On the ensuing penalty kill, Steve Montador tried to be a hero and smack the puck from his own goal line all the way up the ice. The wind-up allowed Eric Staal to make contact with Montador's stick. The clear attempt turned into a perfect centering pass for Staal, and he stuffed it home.

Carolina Goal #2:
Phil Kessel lost his handle on the puck, trying to take the blue line. No big deal, it happens, just recollect and try again. But he got a bit ahead of himself. Actually, he only got ahead of his left foot, but that caused his body to get ahead of the puck. He fell down, Carolina scooped up the loose puck, roared up ice with a 3 on 2 advantage and Sergei Samsonov wound up with the goal.

Carolina Goal #3:
After coming as close to scoring as a team in overtime can, Zdeno Chara and Stephane Yelle forgot how to play in their own zone. Chara lazily passed up the boards, Yelle never got it, Samsonov recovered the fumble, took it deep, drew Chara, shot it, and Jokinen slapped in the rebound.

Fucking painful. And I'm not trying to detract from Carolina's well-deserved win. I'm not attributing their victory to luck. They played a great game. But the Bruins could have stolen a victory in Raleigh, taken a 2-1 series lead, and retaken control.



As a true Bruins fan, it's hard not to be negative, and scared shitless. To be honest, how this team deals with such a loss, and such a crappy situation will be interesting to see. They're young, and they might fold faster than Superman on laundry day.

But the situation is not as bad as my black and gold (mostly black) vision makes it seem. The Bruins are down 2-1, but they're not facing elimination. If they win game 4, then it's suddenly a best of 3 series with the Bruins having home ice. And on the semi-bright side, they lost because of their own fuck-ups, not because Carolina is a more talented team.



The Bruins need to do 4 things in Game 4:
1) Plant someone in front of the net. When Lucic and Recchi were there, good things happened. The most frustrating part of watching tonight's game was when Bruin centering passes would fly through empty creases because nobody was home.



2) Score on the power play. 0 for their last 16 with a man advantage. The Hurricanes have taken away what the Bruins want to do on the PP, so it's time to crash the net. Punish Carolina for taking away the point shot from Chara and Wideman.

3) Pass from the point, don't shoot. Enough perimeter crap, it's not working. In fact, it's counterproductive. Chara winds up for a 100 MPH blast, the Canes get in position to block and go on the counterattack. Shoot when there's a bit of a lane, but when they try to block, shoot it off the boards to the side of the net, hope for a weird bounce that acts as an indirect centering pass.

4) The puck is a baby, take care of it. Don't give it to strangers, especially in your own fucking zone. High percentage passes ONLY, especially in your own zone, and the neutral zone. The defensemen in particular need to be faster when it comes to passing out of the zone. You can't take your time and allow a Cane to get in front of you, severely reducing your options.

I still love the Bruins chances in this series, but not if they play like they did for most of Game 3. In my opinion, had the Bruins won tonight, it would have been fortunate, even lucky, a nice win stolen on the road.

Game 4, Friday night, 7:30PM, it's on NESN. Not a must win, but it's close to it.

Source:
ESPN.com

Photo Credits:
AP Photo/Karl B DeBlaker
AP Photo/Gerry Broome

CAN WE PLAY THE YANKEES EVERYDAY?

How much of a dislikeable cunt is Joba Chamberlain? How would he pitch in the National League, if he had to take some medicine at the plate. His beanball of Jason Bay was clearly intentional, and props to Josh Beckett for not retaliating in last night's game. It wasn't the right time.

That being said, I'm a bit jealous. I wish our pitchers would throw inside and occasionally at the Rays. When Evan Longoria is able to dive out over the plate to turn on an outside fastball and hit it out of the park, something's wrong.

But back to Jason Bay, he's carrying this team. With Youkilis hurt (and now Ellsbury hurt), and Ortiz not hitting homeruns, Bay has provided the power and late inning heroics for this team. Bay has 1 more HR and 7 more RBI than Manny Ramirez. If I still cared about fantasy baseball, I'd probably be kicking myself for not drafting Bay in the middle rounds.

Beckett looked good, except in the 3rd inning. That's been a problem with him: one big inning. That could mean his problems have been more psychological than physical. Remember Falco's speach about quicksand in The Replacements?

It's nice to be 5-0 against the Yankees. Yanks fans will make excuses, like A-Rod being out. And that's fair. After all, April and May are A-Rod's best months.

The Man of the Game: Jason Bay.

The Indians come to town for 2 games (I'm sick of these dinky 2 game series) starting tonight. Justin Masterson takes on 1-3 Carl Pavano. The game is on NESN+.

Source:
ESPN.com

Photo Credit:
AP Photo/Julie Jacobson

CLOSE BUT NO CIGAR

Game 1 of the Eastern Conference semis wasn't supposed to be easy for the Celtics. Exhausted from over 370 minutes of basketball against the Bulls, the C's were supposed to have a hangover in Game 1. Which they did. For the first half, at least.

But the Celtics showed a lot of depth, a lot of character, and a lot of willpower in their Game 1 loss. The Magic, on the other hand, showed a great deal of vulnerability, and absolutely no killer instinct. They gave the Celtics endless opportunities to come back and win, and the C's actually missed a few of them.

Ray Allen had an off night, which is understandable after the Bulls series, especially for a shooter. Rondo could have been better. Pierce was fine with 23 points.

I would have liked to see Marbury get more than 9 minutes. He had a solid outing, contributing 8 points.

The last time the Magic beat the Celtics, I said that Orlando didn't scare me. They still don't. They have talent, but they lack all the pieces to win in a gutsy series. The Celtics may be spent, and might not win. But they have more character in their fingers than Orlando has on its entire roster.

Celtics in 7.

Source:
ESPN.com

Photo Credit:
AP Photo/Charles Krupa

YANKEES OFFICIALLY SUCK

The Sox can't beat the Rays, but the Yankees are as beatable as the Orioles these days. First trip to the new Yankee Stadium and the Sox held on for a 6-4 win.

It was a bit too dramatic for my liking. Papelbon hasn't looked like himself this year. I don't know when we become worried about that, but a few more harry outings and the bullpen suddenly looks like a liability and not a strength.

The Man of the Game is Jason Bay, who was 3 for 5 with a big 2 run homer in the 7th.

Beckett vs. Chamberlain in the final game of this short series.

Source:
ESPN.com

SLOPPY SECOND (GAME)

You have to tip your cap to Cam Ward and the Carolina Hurricanes. After shying from physicality in Game 1, the Canes actively sought contact, won their share of battles along the boards, and didn't simply let themselves be pushed around. Cam Ward was at his 2006 Conn Smythe best, and the B's were shutout for the first time since March 10th.



But the Bruins did their part in losing this game. The most successful aspect of their Game 1 strategy was dominating the crease in front of Cam Ward, screening him, tipping in goals, and so forth. Lucic was the best at doing this in Game 1, and his screen allowed Aaron Ward's opening goal to escape Cam Ward's vision.

In Game 2, the Canes clogged the slot, and the Bruins willingly didn't fight to retake control of the front of the net. They played an outside game, like a three point shooting college basketball team. The Bruins adapted to Carolina's strategy instead of fighting against it, which normally is good, but it wasn't in Game 2.

Cam Ward is not going to get caught out of position, because his post-to-post speed keeps him in every play. You can pass from the point, to the corner, to the back of the net, back to the point; but you won't catch him making a mistake, or being too slow to keep up with where the puck is. In order to beat Cam Ward, you have to play a tight, hard game up front. Get tips, create screens, take away his outstanding eyesight.

In Game 2, the Bruins utterly failed to make the neutral zone their own. They allowed the Hurricanes to take it with minimal effort. The B's used this super conservative defensive gameplan against Alex Ovechkin and the Capitals during the season. I'm not a big fan of it. In trying to stop Carolina's excellent counterattacking, the Bruins actually enabled it. Simultaneously, the B's refusal to challenge Carolina in the neutral zone eliminated any chance of a Bruin counterattack. Did you notice how many more odd man rushes the Bruins had in Game 1 compared to Game 2? Because I did.



Blake Wheeler needs to remember how to shoot.

Andrew Ference needs to clear off just a bit more rust.

It's unfortunate that the Bruins best line in Game 2 was their 4th line.

Milan Lucic needs to not knee an opponent, especially after a whistle.

The Bruins need to remember that there are 20 fucking minutes in a period, not 19 minutes and 55 seconds. That reviewed non-goal was a goal, and it wasn't a goal. Did the puck cross the line? I don't know. But I do know that it should have never had a chance to come near the line.



The Bruins need to bear down (hahaha, bear) as the series shifts to Raleigh. That's a tough place to play, believe it or not. There aren't many hockey fans in North Carolina, but those that are fans are some of the most passionate for the game. The Bruins will also give up the privilege of last change, so matching up Chara against Eric Staal will become much more difficult.

Two days off is a good amount of time to prepare to fight Carolina for control over the crease, and domination of the neutral zone.



Game 2, Wednesday night.

Source:
ESPN.com

Photo Credits:
AP Photo/Winslow Townson
AP Photo/Charles Krupa

THE NIGHT CHICAGO DIED

There was almost no way that Game 7 would live up to the hype and expectations befitting the so-called "Best Series Ever." After 6 games and 7 overtimes, a tired bunch of players wearing red and green did battle with their last ounces of strength. And the Celtics had the character and the will to win it.



The refs were horrible. Apart from Game 6, this may have been the Worst Series Ever for officiating. Doesn't Kirk Hinrich have a reputation as a flopper yet? He's the human version of the butterfly effect. A butterfly flaps its wings in Africa and Hinrich falls over. If he were a hockey player he'd be the Assistant Captain of the Montreal Canadiens.

The bench came through, finally, and unexpectedly. If I told you that the Celtics won Game 7, you'd assume Pierce or Rondo stepped up, or maybe Ray Ray dropped another 50 points. Not that the bench turned things around for the C's in the 2nd quarter. Not that the bench combined for 30 points. Not that Scal had 8 points to get the reserves going. Not that Eddie House was 5 for 5 with 16 points. Marbury only had 2 points, but he looked confident, and was +11. Hell, even Mikki Moore became useful.

But let's not forget the star performers. A visibly hurt/worn out Rondo only had 7 points, but amassed 11 assists. Pierce had a solid 20 points, and was clutch in the 4th. Allen had 23 very timely points.

And how about the game Kendrick Perkins had? A double-double for the big man, with 13 boards, and 14 points.



No more Brad Miller always seeming like he's on the verge of tears. No more Kirk Hinrich having an internal sneeze, spazzing out, and going to the line because of it. No more Joakim Noah's schoolyard routine (how the hell did House get a foul for celebration and Noah doesn't whenever he makes a spectacle of himself?)



The Celtics reminded the NBA and the world why they are The Champions.

Source:
ESPN.com

Photo Credits:
AP Photo/Michael Dwyer
AP Photo/Elise Amendola