Patriots Cut Their Best Tweeter

No, it's not Ochocinco. It was guard Rich Ohrnberger. Who, for my money, is one of the funniest people on Twitter. Some examples:

Based on the amount of fast food I eat in my car, alone, somewhere dark, I probably should never get laid. #beatingtheoddssince2002

— Rich Ohrnberger (@ohrnberger) February 18, 2012

It's my B-DAY! My folks got me a kindle fire. I've gone from hiding my porn IN books to finding my porn ON books. I <3 technology #thanksmom

— Rich Ohrnberger (@ohrnberger) February 14, 2012

In route to SB46 my brother was finger frisked in a secure room at LaGuardia airport--Kenny G's "Songbird" played quietly in the background.

— Rich Ohrnberger (@ohrnberger) February 5, 2012

Boredom has ruined more of my socks and t-shirts than anything else. #ineverhaveanypapertowels

— Rich Ohrnberger (@ohrnberger) January 27, 2012

If "disappointing" had a smell ...I'd say that's me 75% of the time.

— Rich Ohrnberger (@ohrnberger) January 26, 2012

In college, chicks called guys like me "slump-busters" #hesa4atbestbutitsbeenawhile

— Rich Ohrnberger (@ohrnberger) January 24, 2012

yo guys with the short pony tails... wait ok.... just wait

— Rich Ohrnberger (@ohrnberger) January 24, 2012

The invention of the mouse and mouse pad has led to a generation of ambidextrous masturbators.

— Rich Ohrnberger (@ohrnberger) January 21, 2012

Hopefully, he finds a job with a new team and continues to tweet his philosophy so we can all bask in his wisely humorous thoughts.