A Black Hole is a cosmic phenomenon that has such a strong gravitational pull that not even light can escape its grasp. It's a focused and powerful concentration of unimaginable density that literally sucks in and absorbs everything around it. No matter what is going on, if a Black Hole is in the area, it becomes the center of attention. Black Holes are the Bobby Valentines of the Universe.
Every story that centers on or even remotely involves the Red Sox this season will ultimately be about Bobby Valentine. He's an egomaniac and an attention whore. He tries to control the entire sports media.
When was the last time that (in Spring Training) there was a very public spat between the Red Sox manager and the manager of another team? How about two spats? Valentine just had stand on his platform to voice his opinions on Ozzie Guillen a few weeks ago. And more recently he took a run at Joe Girardi for not wanting to take a Spring Training game into extra innings.
He enjoys creating these meaningless nothing stories.
The marriage of Bobby V and the Boston sports media is perfect. In theory. We have one of the hungriest medias in the country here, and Bobby Valentine will feed them three meals a day, plus snacks. The media is hungry and Bobby V loves to cook.
That marriage might need some counseling, though. After Chris Gasper pointed out differences of opinions between Valentine and GM Ben Cherington, Valentine lashed out at the media. He called it "lazy journalism."
And after he denied the rift about 3 times, that's when his denials became less and less believable.
What does Valentine expect? More fluff pieces about wrap sandwiches? More Girardi vs. Valentine crap that he initiates?
The thing about Black Holes is that they suck up everything around them, without the ability to pick and choose what it absorbs. Bobby V likes to control the media, to use it as a tool to motivate players, or even just to placate his own starving ego. Sometimes, however, the media actually does their job. They report that the egomaniacal manager is having disagreements with the inexperienced pawn of a GM.
Bobby Valentine loves a circus, so long as he's the Ring Leader. That's how he feels like life and the Universe should work, with him in the center, controlling everything.
For now, that's not a terrible thing for the Sox. He is drawing all the media's scrutiny. All the pressure from the press is falling on him. The Sox have Cody Ross as a starting outfielder, no idea who their short-stop will be, and can't seem to find a 4th or 5th starter.
Yet everyone is talking about Bobby Valentine.
His egomania is protecting the team. Today. When they play meaningful games, they'll have to fend for themselves. And Circus Ring Leader Bobby Valentine will find out that the media aren't his minions. They will be his assassins.